Porn is finally about to make its way to outer space, let us rejoice (7 Photos)

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Pornhub are always on the cutting-edge of technology, as is porn in general for those paying attention, and now they want to take the first porn film outside of Earth’s atmosphere. That’s right, we might be in for some bizarre sex at zero-gravity –however that would work. So for just $3.4 Million, you can send two porn stars into space to be pioneers in sexploration.

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According to Sr. space advisor, Oswaldo Bean, “The time has come to raise the bar even higher… like outer space high.”
But he won’t be the man in the heat of the “action,” rather it will be the two porn stars seen below.

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Eva Lovia and Johnny Sins recently signed on to the project because, according to Mr. Sins, “We’re going to make porn… in space!” Hear, hear!!

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So how will this all go down? Teehee. Well, Pornhub is going to use your $3.4M, and spend 6 months practicing sex at zero-gravity. After that, they will send the stars up in a commercial spaceship. Sex will commence at the rocket’s blastoff, and the stars’ blastoff is scheduled for when they reach maximum altitude. Don’t ask me how they can be this calculated with the timing of things (God knows I’d never make it), but I suppose that’s where your training comes in — teehee, AGAIN.

Virgin Galactic would be a natural fit for this mission, but so far they haven’t made any statements.

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Here’s PornHub’s anticipated costs broken down in a pie chart.

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So you might be asking yourself why should you have to pay for Pornhub’s expenses. Good question. According to Pornhub, “With a project of these intergalactic proportions it is important to us that our members have a say in how it all goes down. Pornhub is all about community, which our huge and dedicated fan base knows to be true. For this same reason, it only makes sense that we involve our members on this journey of Sexploration.”

Contributions can be as low as $1, and as high as $500 if you’d like to get the sextronauts to say your name in space. You read that right.

And if you have $150K to blow… these spacesuits could be yours:
“Complete With Underwear”

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The PH sexploration is set to be released late in 2016. Get your popcorn and lube ready. Ewwe, even I’m offended at hearing that. Sorry.

Found at Distractify

Source : thechive[dot]com

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